Ragnarr: Why It's Better to be a Bastard than a Wanker

There's a lot of great reasons to be a bastard. Your parents having a wee bit too much fun out of wedlock, for starters. Hitting uppity shites in the face with a mace to get your Paladin buddies to stop trying to reason with him, that's nice too. Or, for that matter, hitting the occasional rubbish bastard while he's down to make damn sure some cleric a thousand miles away isn't going to start healing him.

But it's never a good idea to be a wanker. Nobody likes a wanker. Sure, they may think they're damn clever. They may even be clever, a bit. But they're damn likely to be so bloody busy being clever that they forget there might be a pack of bastards in their office with their damn nice desk and their damn fine liquor. And this pack of bastards might have crowbars and what have you, and a fine bag of holding to put the parts of that desk into, especially when it can be sold for funds to buy shiny things.

And especially when that pack of bastards has got a cleric who knows the will of Pelor.

Pelor doesn't want wankers to have good liquor. That's what he put his clerics on this plane for.